REHEATED TAKE: FAST FOOD POWER RANKINGS, PART 1

This whole concept is pretty precious. Look at these bougie writers pretending that they’re down with the people! Or—even worse—maybe they’re being ironic. The ’90s are over, guys. So are the ’00s, for that matter. –Pete

SEATTLE FAST FOOD POWER RANKINGS: FIRST WINDOW (8-4)

What is the most powerful fast food location in Seattle?

This is a complicated question. You might think you know. BUT YOU DON’T. Fortunately for you, we know the right answer.

The huge staff of How’s Your Morale? has taken great pains to SCIENTIFICALLY and METHODICALLY select the finest FAST FOOD LOCATIONS in Seattle. We used scads of data, mountains of research, oceans of numbers, acres of clams, and a metric fuckton of really good judgment to figure this out. …